Thursday, December 28, 2006

The Things You Don't Know That You Don't Know About Writing Children's Books

So there I was. I had three manuscripts in front of me. A respected colleague had just ripped my face off for spending time on such folly. What was I going to do now?

He was blasting the idea of the concept more than the manuscripts. But he had looked at the stories and was still willing to yell, "What's the point.''

That certainly gave me pause even though the niche we were going after was closer to low-key, warm and fuzzy, than the classic children's tale that would change the world.

I consider myself a professional. If I get a negative critique I'm not going to blow it off like so many beginning writers do. They somehow rationalize that it's the audience's mistake if they don't get it, not theirs. In many ways that's what gives self publishing the bad reputation it has.

So my attitude became, "The world is going to have to convince me that this or these stories are good enough to be published by somebody that was a professional.'' AND FRIENDS AND FAMILY DON'T COUNT. Friends and family are always going to be kind and pull out the one positive thing you can bask in. The publishing world is a brutal place to make a living so the only time you should take Friends and Family comments to heart is when they say something negative. Then you have a BIG PROBLEM. If they're willing to bring it to your attention you have a show stopper on your hands.

So how could I start getting meaningful feedback from the world?

There's a million freelance children's book script doctors and editors out there. That's where I started. I sent a manuscript to two different freelance editors - one on the West Coast and one on the East Coast. They generally charge per page. You will pay anywhere from $60 to $200 for a picture book manuscript critique.

The first thing you'll notice from this experience is there are basic picture book and general book things that you need to know. Of course I didn't know them and the script doctors got to call me a newbie in so many words for not knowing the basics in a business that you profess to be working in. Great start.

Here are the three silliest things I didn't know before i started this process:

If you write a sentence on a piece of paper or a computer file you own the copyright on that sentence. Beginning writers make a big deal about plastering copyright over everything so no one will steal their words. Can't be done you newbie.

If your goal is to send your manuscript to a publisher don't worry about illustrations. Publishers don't want illustrations from authors. Why? Authors don't have a clue when it comes to the illustration level required to sell a book. Publishers use their own illustrators for good reason.

A picture book has a format. It must be done in 32 pages. Not 30 or 36. 32. You can do 36 pages but no publisher will buy it. It's a printing press thing rookie.

Way to go Michael. Or should I say Mr. Professional.

Michael LaLumiere





Tuesday, December 26, 2006

So You Want To Write Books For Children?

A few years back I was working on a non-fiction book with writing partner Kim Messinger. The subject was inclusion in regards to children with special needs. Kim is a director of a preschool on the East Coast. She has hundreds and hundreds of children's books.

One day we started talking about what she thought was missing in the children's books being published today.

Her complaints started with language. She says people always underestimate how smart children are. They write down to them. The language in these books should be much richer, she said. "Children deserve that.''

Her next biggest complaint was the lack of stories that parent and child could read together that they could relate to together. I guess she wasn't enamored with stories about farting dogs and pigeons driving buses. For now I'm going to be calling these missing stories feel-good, parent-child stories.

That got me curious. I went to the bookstore and looked around. There were funny books and books with cute ideas but I couldn't find many heart-warming, every-day morality tales that a parent would be happy to read to their child. And very, very few with rich language.

I don't have children so I started bugging her about what 4, 5 and 6-year-olds talk about. What's important to them at that age. How did she relate to her own children and the hundreds that have attended her school.

I came up with three bare-boned stories/main characters and showed them to Kim. From there we rewrote and edited them together and came out with what we considered three fairly good picture book manuscripts.

I thought to myself, "Hey I can do this. No problem. I've found a new career.''

I emailed the stories to an old newspaper colleague of mine. I have great respect for this guy as both a writer and editor. I was expecting rave reviews and a few minutes of basking in the glow of his applause and autograph-seeking.

But first there was shock and surprise. He could not believe that an old, hard-bitten, no-nonsense, news editor would write children's books.

Then it was my turn to be shocked and surprised. He went on a three-page rant that could be summarized as: Every Joker Thinks They Can Write a Warm, Fuzzy Children's Story. You Loser. Something like that. And he was right. It was a wake-up call I needed and something I think everyone needs to remember. Not the loser part. The other part.

Michael LaLumiere

Saturday, December 23, 2006

The Self-Publishing Journey Part I

Hello

My Name is Michael LaLumiere. My intention with this blog is to help people who need more information when it comes to Self-Publishing. I had some advantages going in but still had to learn a lot the hard way. In fact, I'm still learning the hard way.

My first book - Princess Caitlin's Tiara - came out last month. The second - Birthday Snow - arrives in two weeks. In Spring, a new children's book and a novel will be added to the catalog.

First some rules. No grading me on grammar. I write fast and loose for blogs. Even at my best I aggressively resist proper punctuation and grammar. The editor working my novel made it very clear that she understands my unwillingness to put in commas but if I expect stores to sell the book I must allow her to fix my whimsical attempts at punctuation and capitalization. Fine.

Feel free to ask questions. But do so at your own peril. The main problem I see with people self-publishing is their unwillingness to face reality. Regarding questions I'm going to consider myself Mr. Reality. I'm going to write a segment every couple days or so. I will gratuitously mention my books and website http://www.staggerleebooks.com/ from time to time.

Now for the advantages I had going into this project. I was a newspaper editor for 18 years and know something about writing and editing. I have a graphics background so I've worked with lots of artists. Working in the newspaper industry i learned some nuts and bolts about the process of publishing. The newspaper business is brutal. If you learn nothing else from it you should get a heaping helping of humility although there are still people in that business thinking they're the smartest people around despite the fact that they're obliviously riding a dying industry into the ground.

But probably the biggest advantage I have is I'm retired and don't mind burning through some money to see what happens.

Which brings us to the first test for people who want to self-publish.

Are you thinking you're going to make money at it?

If you say yes or hesistate at all before you say I don't know, OUT OF THE POOL. Five percent of self-publishers can make a living off it. If you think you're one of those five percent you should talk with Mr. Reality.

I'll write again the day after Christmas. Thanks, Michael LaLumiere